


I'll Chase The Demons Away For You

by imnotmadeofeyes



Series: We're Two Broken Parts Fitting Together [2]
Category: Bandom, Of Mice & Men (Band)
Genre: AU, Cuddling, Established Relationship, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mpreg
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-25
Updated: 2014-07-25
Packaged: 2018-02-10 09:32:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,412
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2019999
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imnotmadeofeyes/pseuds/imnotmadeofeyes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Austin tries his best, but sometimes it gets hard to cope. Alan is there to help him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'll Chase The Demons Away For You

**Author's Note:**

> Ahem yeah so I fell in love with this story and that's why now you get a second part, hah. Hope you like it, leave some feedback! There will be more soon, I promise.

The night before their first appointment at the office of the male pregnancy specialist, Dr. Wentz, Alan wakes up because Austin has a nightmare. In the two weeks after they have found out that they were becoming parents, Austin had taken the news really well. Actually, Alan is surprised just how well Austin is taking it. He’s always stayed away from kids and has been awkward as soon as one of the little human beings are as much as in the same room as him, but now his eyes shine when he talks about their future. He plans on building up another room in their spacious loft with the help of his friend Phil who has a construction firm, and he’s just generally so happy about the prospect of having a baby with them that it’s easily topping Alan’s own happiness.

But that night, it gets obvious that Austin still hasn’t gotten rid of his demons completely. Alan wakes up to a hand slapping against his chest because Austin is thrashing out uncontrollably. He’s covered in a glistening sheen of sweat, his short dark hair sticking to his forehead like he just got out of the shower. The muscles under his tattooed skin are clenching and unclenching in an uneven rhythm, and his face is pulled into a pained grimace, eyes squeezed shut tight, eyebrows drawn together, lips altering between pressed together harshly or opening to let out silent whimpers and pleas. Thinking about it, it’s not that different from how he looks during sex – though, to Alan, it’s the complete opposite.

A repeated string of “No no no, please, don’t” leaves Austin’s mouth, and he curls in on his side like he’s trying to protect himself, and that’s when Alan knows – in his mind, his lover is back in his childhood home, back with his drunk, violent father. Alan has to get him out of there. First, he turns on the light so when Austin wakes up he sees something else but complete darkness, then he grabs Austin’s shoulders, carefully avoiding the hands that are still moving as if to shove others away that are gripping him, shaking them while he presses kisses to Austin’s cold, sweaty face.

“Wake up, baby” Alan says, and though it’s gentle, it’s in his normal volume. “Please Austin, you need to wake up”

And he does, soon enough. His body stills in Alan’s grip, and the younger man watches the dark eyes of him flick through the room in terror – a reaction he knows well enough now and knows to soothe with the light he’s turned on a minute earlier – before settling on Alan. Only then, Austin relaxes; he lets Alan pull him into his embrace when the first sobs shake his body.

“Shush, baby, it’s ok” Alan murmurs, his lips pressed against Austin’s temple, his fingers carding through his hair and stroking over his back to soothe him. He knows how bad his lover is shaken by those nightmares, and he remembers the time a few years back when they came almost daily. He’s so glad he barely has them now anymore. But what worries Alan most in that moment is the reason why the nightmares returned now.

Austin clutches him tightly, lets himself be maneuvered in a more comfortable position with Alan leaning against the headboard, the taller man in his lap. Alan rocks him from side to side gently, murmuring little things to calm Austin down in his ear, cradling him like he is just a kid that needs to be calmed down. Sometimes it feels like in moments like these, Austin is only that. As a kid, the elder never had somebody to hold him like that, and Alan is trying to make up for that now.

Eventually, Austin calms down, his tears stop, and his hands come up to wipe his face a little bit awkwardly. He even goes as far as to shoot Alan a little embarrassed smile. “I’m sorry I woke you up”

“I’m glad you did” Alan replies and leans forward to press another kiss to Austin’s forehead. “Wanna tell me what happened?” He knows that Austin will do, sooner or later. If he doesn’t find the words tonight, he will tomorrow morning over a cup of coffee and some cereal. It’s what he learned in his therapy: never keep those things to yourself, talk about them with somebody you trust. That somebody has always been Alan.

Austin leans his head on Alan’s shoulder and wraps his arms around Alan’s middle again, but he still speaks up after a short couple of seconds. “My dad beat me up again. It was a bit – a bit of a memory. Until –“ He stops for a second, and Alan tightens his grip on him, brings his other hand up to run through the slowly drying now messy dark hair he loves so much. “It wasn’t me he beat up. It was a little kid that looked a bit like you and a bit like me. I-I knew it was ours, y’know? And I couldn’t – I couldn’t stop him.” His breathing started to hitch again, and Alan shushed him again even though his heart was beating too quickly.

What Austin was telling, it hit Alan square in the chest. He didn’t need to ask to know why it unsettled Austin so badly – he was afraid that he would end like his dad and his kid would end like them. It wasn’t hard to admit that they used to be really badly fucked up before they put themselves – and each other – together again. Alan hated that Austin thought he could become something like that. Austin was so gentle, so loving, and he’s truly never met a person that was as much as half as good as him. He couldn’t hurt a fly – well, he could, actually, but not without a good reason. He would protect himself and those he loved, but he would never throw the first punch. He was a lot better and a lot smarter than that.

“That won’t happen” Alan reassures the man in his arms gently. “We won’t ever let anyone lay a hand on our child.” He feels Austin nod more than he sees it, and they continue to sit there in the middle of the night, just holding each other tightly. Eventually, Austin’s hand sprawls across Alan’s belly and he strokes it softly in a barely there touch, a motion he loves to do ever since he found out about the baby growing there. It never fails to make Alan’s pulse flutter and a red color graze his cheeks. Right now, Alan’s stomach isn’t standing out at all, but it’s flatter than before where it used to cave in a bit between the sharp juts of his hipbones.

Austin smiles at Alan with adoration so prominent in his features that it almost brings tears into his lover’s eyes. “I love you so much” Austin murmurs. Alan pulls him closer, kisses him sweetly. It’s moments like this, three am in a week night where he has to get up in four hours to not be late for his class that he’s most in love with Austin, because this just shows him why he’s never been able to stay mad at him, why they never get insulting no matter how bad their fight is and why he’s never going to be able to leave him. They need each other, they complete each other. He loves it.

“I love you, too, Aus” he whispers right back. Sometimes he feels like shouting it from the rooftops, but in moments like that, the words are so precious to Alan that he barely dares voice them out loud. He rather expresses them in hands caressing Austin’s slightly tanned skin, lips pressing soft kisses onto it.

They share another couple of kisses, but soon enough, they’re both sleepy again. And they know that the big day is tomorrow – tomorrow they will find out more about the baby they have made, the little thing that is growing inside Alan’s belly. And so they turn off the light again and slide beneath the covers, where Austin pulls Alan flush against him, the back of the younger against his chest, his fingers still on his belly. Alan covers the big tattooed hand with his own and falls asleep with a smile on his lips and a nose pressed into his hair. He feels happy and secure.


End file.
